A little dark... I warned you "enter at your own risk"!!

I have vivid dreams.  Sometimes, they are so real, I can't remember if it was just a dream or if it actually happened.  Many times there are songs in them, like a soundtrack.  I suppose that's kind of cool, but sometimes it just bugs me.  The other night the soundtrack was the song "Falling to pieces" and it was stuck in my head all day.  Then another time it was the song by Far East Movement "Like a G6" - try getting THAT out of your head.  (If you haven't heard it, please google it and enjoy that one entrapped in your mind for awhile!)
I have a recurring dream.  It happens once every few weeks or so.  It's always about the same thing, the same issue that needs to be resolved.  Sometimes the place or details change, but it always has the same end result.  I always wake up affected.  Sad.  Happy.  Thoughtful.  Some would say it's a sign.  Maybe someone somewhere is trying to tell me something?  Psychologists would say it's because this area in my life needs to be resolved.  I like the first choice.  I prefer to think that it's a sign.  Probably because resolving something means dealing with it.  I don't really want to, because I like the dream and however irritating it might be it keeps me connected to my feelings.  The real ones.  The ones that people always try to cover up from everyone else.
Do you do that?  Do you keep your real feelings hidden?  Do you go about your life acting as though everything just couldn't be better?  Putting on appearances?  That's not to say that you don't love your life and the people in it.  You may absolutely be content.  I believe there is more to a person though.  Whatever it was that might have influenced you emotionally long ago, maybe when you were little, or maybe someone you really loved...it's not like it just goes away.  It carves a place in your heart and that's where all the old affections live, until you have a dream or hear a song, or smell something that transports you back to that time in your life.  You reminisce.  You feel nostalgic and at times you miss it, not because you are discontented, but more because it's totally part of you now.  You may not even know it, -as you sit there and try to figure out why your even letting it be a thought - but it has created who you are today.  So I suppose it's right to accept it.  I know not everyone does... they want to forget because it was shameful or unacceptable, or it shows vulnerability, and they are known to be the "strong one".  They have the perfect appearance now.  The truth is that you can keep those feelings and places inside hidden for years.  But eventually they will come out, like a sliver in your skin, your mind will reject it and you will have no choice but to face it.
Don't be ashamed of what made you who you are, or the people involved in sculpting you into what you are today.  Embrace it.  It's the same as when you were little and you were told "if you tell the truth, you won't be in as much trouble as you will if you tell a lie".  So true.  Who knew that was going to be applied to your entire life and not just that one instant.  Do you see the metaphor?  Perhaps, I should take my own advice.


Until next time, my lovelies
T♥